Journal of my Crazy Dreams

This was yesterday night’s dream:

Its a normal day, I wake up, go for a brush, get ready, go to lab, take coffee, play some games, did a little work, think about the chick I like (Lets call her Girl#1), rant about some stupid things… it is going very regular. With all the usual problems in life that everyone has, me, a perfectly normal person, spends his day as normally as he can, as everyone does. Friends decide lets order pizza for dinner, watched a movie in the night, again rant about the same things we do everyday, talk about Girl#1, something like, she doesnt talk much and that she aint that cool since she listens to some stupid folk music, its lame, then I played some games on PSP, etc etc. Things could not be more normal.

Something is different, however. I am hearing voices, they are not any understandible language, neither are they human, they are just mumblings. Freaked for a moment, I shook my head to see if it was just a feeling. There is no one around. The voices go a little louder, what is happening? My friends come over to my room, they talk about all the things everyday, but I am not able to concentrate, the voices are becoming irritating. I scratch my head hard, the voices start panicing real bad. The panics scared me, I took my hand off my head, the voices became a little relieved but it felt like me scratching my head caused some sort of disaster for them. Oh my God! Are there people living on my head? Where? Inside my brain or on my scalp? Or on my hair? I have no idea, I cannot understand them. But I do understand that they all feel pain when I shake my head or scratch it or worse if I try to pour water or apply shampoo. Oh no, when that shampoo goes in my eyes, it burns! What will happen to them? I think I am going crazy.

Taking the heavy head, keeping it as balanced as I can, I go to lab, sit in front of my terminal, I try starting my usual web browsing… but I am not able to concentrate. Aarrgh the voices! I thought lets play some games, I always like playing game, and they always help me. No! I am not able to even play games either! Can I work? Of course not! “Hey do I want a coffee?” I have no idea if I want a coffee! My guide asks me to do somethings, but I cannot understand what those things are. Oh man, this is not good.

Days passed by like that, each day seems longer and longer. I am not taking shower, not moving much, not talking to most people, because I mostly cant. People are starting to stare at me. My close friends ask me if I need help, but who is gonna believe me? Oh man, this is not good. Shit, all the chicks will think this dude is a psycho. But I dont care really, I have a much bigger problem in my head. This is crazy, or I think I am going crazy. Nothing else is there in my life but those voices. My parents call to tell me the usual things at home and ask me about my health and all. I somehow tell them the generic answers. There is some rock show going on closer to our hostel, everyone is going. I cannot go of course, I cannot head bang. I stay quietly in my room, listening to those voices.

It seems they start singing some tune whenever I am shaking my head or if unintentionally my head gets some damage. There must be people living on my head. Thats why when disaster comes, they possibly start praying. Who do they pray to? Do they know me? I bet not, and I bet they have no idea where they are living. I keep hearing voices, I watch my friends doing their regular work, keeping up with the fast paced life, but I hear voices. Sometimes the voices go violent, I even hear explosions and many panics. I did not shake my head, then why are you screaming? I try explaining them in my head that I am doing what I can, but they have to stop fighting among themselves. I dont know if my voice goes to them, it will be good if it does. But they are mostly calm and good people.

A month have passed by. Overwhelmed and disgruntled from everyday life’s regulations, which I am absolutely not able to keep up to, one day I go to this small hill where there is a small garden. Many people come there, sit quitely, hear the birds chirp and see the beautiful trees, the whole city is visible from there. Its a nice place. The voices are still there but I think I am use to them now. Some moments later, I see Girl#1 roaming around the garden between the flowers… wow she is so good looking. Wait a second, why is she coming towards me? Not that I care about anything in this world now, or about her. But I am curious why she is coming towards me.

She comes and sits with me, she says, “It’s a big responsibility, isn’t it?”, she continues, “Sometimes they seem like a burden to me, but what can I do, they are people, I cannot just discard them”. She keeps talking with her beautiful voice, this voice I can clearly hear within the noises from my head. Her voice is so smooth. The noises in my head seem to go down a bit, it looks like even they like her voice. We kept chatting, share our feelings towards our situation. She even gave me some tips, like she listens to some folk music, that keeps the people on her head calm and peaceful. She understands me. After a while, the day goes down, clouds start moving faster, people fast forwarding, the whole city fast forwards. For the first time it feels the voices are not a burden, at least I am with her because of them. After a little more while, I am able to see day and night cycle within my 5 minutes. She talks and I listen. I determine myself, I can do this for all eternity and take care of the people on my head only if, she is there beside me. We keep sitting there, talking and talking, and talking….. forever.

Connections with real life: Trying to figure out, but it was a beautiful dream, I will never forget